Standing at my easel to Begin

Ever since I can remember, I have thought of the sun as a distraction. In all its well meaningness the sun shines, as it was meant to, brightening every color and heightening all our senses. But for me, most days, I found it to be too much. Those glorious rays were overstimulating, just too bright. So on a day like today when the sky is lugubrious and gray, I am drawn to my easel to create. It is quite. The sun is not screaming colors at me.

Focus is easy to come by today. I have a sense of what I want to create. I have a sense of th emeotion within the painting-to-be. I understand why it is now that it comes forth in my mind. As I think about it many of my paintings are not based on the image as ina visualization but on the emotion within it. Or as I project my feeling into the art. Isn't that what seperates a picture from art. Art's soul (LOL) purpose IMHO is to make that emotional connection with a viewer. Not too long ago, while still in the self-doubt period of wondering if I was indeed an artist, I showed a piece of work to an acquaintence and she cried. At that moment, I overwhelmed by her reaction. It took me several years to really undestand the praise bestowed on me.

So today, there is a mother and child to be painted. I feel trust and the potential hidden somewhere in the body of the infant. There is a mother enamored by the gift she holds. After, hearing the first inhalation from her baby, she basks in the miracle of life. I , as probably all people do, have favorite colors I gravitate to. So palette selection is usually fast, familiar and comfortable. And most probably it excludes reds and pinks.

I don't do much more planning than that. I go with the flow on paper or canvas. This morning,I felt like making small boxes or pixels turned on point. The entire piece became focused on color value. It is a very vivid piece as the purple and yellow gold work well together.

Soon I'll get this one framed and it will be the first, on my way to the 14 frames.

Invitation to Beginning Frame # 1

Like most artists, I knew from an early age this is what I was suppose to do with my life. Yet that is not where life took me for over 4 decades, so I am finally returning to whom I was suppose to be and moving forward with great zeal. Okay, so along with the zeal is a boat load of learning how to stop doubting, stop judging and stop comparing and just CREATE.

Creating for me is seeing. It is the visualization in my head, which somehow from mind to hand magically appears on the chosen surface. Most artists refer to that process as being in the flow. It is a place where time vanishes, thinking evaporates, distraction is non-existent and all the energy flows into the creation. I think it is a magical place. It is the place I want to go to each and everyday. Oh, how I wish I could but that is not how art happens. This muse of mine is fickle at times. I have stood before my easel with no amount of flow forthcoming. It is a right side of the brain road block. It is the greatest form of frustration to endure when all I want to do is create. Where does the right side of my brain go in these tormenting hours? Why must this be? I think Vincent Van Gogh had a rather good answer to this dilemma. And, I might add, that it is rather reassuring to know he had tormented painting days too. He said that on days when he painted with the most awful outcomes that is when he knew, that the only choice was to paint more and more until flow returned. So now on brain lock days, I think of Vincent and smile, knowing the flow will come if I am quiet, patient and painting.

My medium of choice is soft radiant pastels. I love how they feel in my hand. I love the mess they leave behind in my hand. I love the velvety texture of moving them across a surface and the way they smudge and blend. I like the hard edge of a clean line or the soft edge and how if creates so much atmosphere. There is a inner joy much like a child with finger paints that is imbued in me. It glows and spills over into every cell and into the pastel itself. I can be four again and be as messy as I like and create something extraordinary with a small stick of radiant color pigment.

Not to long ago, I bought 14 frames at an art store, that was clearing out an inventory. They were gold, ornate and garish, nothing I would every buy but there was something about them that compelled me to collect up 14 of them. The thought came to me that if I could fill all of them, I would have a body of work that I could sell via a variety of venues. So I packed them into my car hoping I would see this crazy idea through. Sharing this idea with a life coach, blogging the process was suggested. I loved the idea from the very moment it was mentioned. (Anyone in search of a wonderful life coach, should check into http://bluheroncoaching.com) So here I am at my very beginning, perhaps you'll come along, on a new path, to my new life, with self-trust and self- confidence enough to create the 14 frames.